This commentary by Ms. Whitman was published by PageOneQ and is used here with permission.

I sat at the beach today, and wondered how many people thought Allan and I, with Zachary in tow, thought we were heterosexual.  Okay, Allan in his tiny Speedo and me in my giant one piece Speedo and, of course, gym shorts, were not exactly looking incredibly straight but the image was enough to bother me.

I had read this morning that over thirty gay activists had been arrested in Moscow.  Nikolai Alekseev, who is currently under arrest and held in a central Moscow police station.  At this point, foreign activists have been set free.  Others have not. None of the people throwing rocks, eggs and threatening violence to the activists have been arrested.

Only the queers.

I sat on the beach today with an uneasy feeling of safety.  While we in America debate civil unions versus marriage rights, job protections and insurance coverage, people in Russia who found the courage to take to the streets in an incredibly homophobic society are sitting in jail.

At Gay Pride, we debate how to be family friendly and still true to our roots as outlandish and spectacular.  How to dance on floats in leather but be sure not to pass out condoms to kids (at Boston Pride, the effort to avoid kids is visible and appreciated).

In Moscow, politicians openly disparage gays and lesbians.  Rudy Giuliani has gone on TV in a dress and openly hateful comments come from the extreme few.  The reason why is the years of effort by gays and lesbians to be visible.  The drag queens and bull dykes of the Stonewall riots could not hide and would not take the abuse from the police anymore.

They took the streets.  They said no more.

Today, as I sat in privilege and comfort, not to mention the warm sun, I wanted to paint a big, pink triangle on my forehead.  Allan and I talked about our discomfort and Zachary heard us.

Why do you care?  He asked.

Because it’s not who I am, I said.  I need to be who I am so you can be whoever you want to be.  No, whoever you need to be.

The people of Stonewall did not have a choice.  The people in Moscow today did not have a choice either.

Why risk life and limb?  Why do I care if anyone thinks  I’m straight when they walk by me? Because the shame of hiding is toxic.  It eats away at your core, your self-esteem and feeling like you have a right to exist. It’s why gays and lesbians have a high level of alcoholism, substance abuse and suicide – especially young people who have yet to develop enough of a sense of self to take jeers and the threat of physical violence in stride.  I don't know a single gay or lesbian person who cannot convey at least one story of personal shame from public condemnation.

It’s not about the right to hold hands in public; it’s about the right not to be beaten for holding hands in public.  I’m not shoving my gayness down anyone’s throat – I’m simply trying to find a small space to breathe in a culture that shoves heterosexuality down my throat every media minute of every day.

My invisibility bothered me today because somewhere halfway across the world, someone just like me took to the streets and fought not for gay marriage or even civil rights but for the basic right to breathe.

I was on the beach while gays and lesbians were being beaten in Moscow.

Sara Whitman lives in Auburndale, Massachusetts with her partner and their three kids. She blogs at SUBURBAN LESBIAN HOUSEWIFE and on The Huffington Post.

OTHER MOSCOW PRIDE 2007 COVERAGE

Moscow Pride:  A Photo Essay.  Eight photographs from l Moscow Pride. 2007

Moscow Gay Pride: Tatchell’s Assailant Not Arrested, Say Police. Moscow police confirm that they have opened a criminal investigation into the assault on British gay human rights campaigner, Peter Tatchell, at last Sunday's Moscow Gay Pride event.  But official police claims that they have arrested the right-wing extremist who punched Mr Tatchell in the face are untrue, according to the investigating officer.  (UK Gay News, June 1)

Moscow Gay Pride Organiser Khramov Found Guilty.  One of the three organisers of Moscow Pride has escaped a jail sentence and was fined when found guilty this afternoon in a Moscow court which threw-out evidence, given at a previous hearing by a number of MPs from Europe, as “frivolous”.  (UK Gay News, June 8)

Portuguese Gay Group Slams Russia, the EU and Portugal’s PM Over Moscow Pride.  The Portuguese gay and lesbian group Panteras Rosa (Pink Panthers) today hit out against the Russian authorities after the weekend’s violence in Moscow during Gay Pride.  (UK Gay News, May 29).

European Union Must Impose Travel Ban on Moscow Mayor of Gay Pride Trouble – Greens.  The British Green Party has today called for a European Union travel ban on the Mayor of Moscow, Yuri Luzhkov, following violence in the streets of the capital on Sunday during Gay Pride – and heavy-handed police tactics which saw many arrests.  (UK Gay News, May 28)

May 28:  UK/Russia:  London Mayor Appeals to Moscow For End of Gay Pride Ban.   Following yesterday’ violence against lesbian and gay rights demonstrators in Moscow – and the arrest of several of the demonstrators – the Mayor of London Ken Livingstone has this morning written to his Moscow counterpart Mayor Luzhkov urging that no charges be brought against those who were demonstrating for lesbian and gay rights.

May 28:  Russia:  Gay Pride Organisers Alekseev and Two Others Await Court  – 15 Days In Prison Expected.  Nikolai Alekseev and two colleagues from Moscow Gay Pride are spending tonight in police custody at they await a court appearance later this morning.

May 28:  Russia:  Ahwazi Arabs Condemn Arrest of Gay Rights Demonstrators in Moscow.  Ahwazi Arab activists last night condemned the treatment of gay rights activist Peter Tatchell and other demonstrators in Moscow yesterday.

May 27:  Russia:  Arrested Gay Pride Activist Asks World for Help.  From inside the Tverskoye police station, where he is being detained, Nikolai Alekseev – one of the Moscow Gay Pride organisers and its spokesperson – has issued a statement asking for international support and for the immediate release of all the gays activists currently being held.

May 27:  Russia:   Moscow Gay Pride: Dispatches from the Front.  There was trouble in Moscow today when participants at Gay Pride,, led by a number of European politicians, tried to deliver a letter of protest to Mayor Yuri Luzhkov at City Hall.  Violence flared as they faced groups of neo-Facist thugs, religious groups, aggressive police and the OMON.  This is a "record" of the dispatches received by UK Gay News from many sources.

May 27:  Russia:  Tatchell at Moscow Gay Pride: We Are In This Fight Together.  Greetings!  I bring you a message of comradeship and solidarity from the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and intersex [LGBTI] human rights organizations OutRage! in London.  Your struggle is our struggle. This is the full text of Peter Tatchell's keynote speech to the Moscow Gay Pride Conference yesterday

May 27:  Russia:  Moscow Gay Pride 2006: Where Were the Human Rights Campaigners? The Same Question Can be Asked Today.  The following commentary by GayRussia.ru was written a year ago.  Has the situation changed?  The stark answer is: “Not really”.   Ludmila Alekseeva of the Moscow Helsinki Group and Lev Ponomarev of the Movement for Human Rights have both declined to come, just as last year.

May 26:  Russia:  Moscow Gay Pride Blog.

May 26:  Russia:  Moscow City Hall Quiet as 120 Journalists Check In For Moscow Gay Pride.  With Gay Pride about to start, Moscow is surprisingly quiet.  Not a single official statement has been released by Mayor of Moscow, unlike at the same time last year.

May 25:  Russia:  Tatchell: The Right To Hold Moscow Pride Is Not Just an Issue of Gay, Lesbian Rights.  International solidarity can help give a psychological and practical boost to local LGBT activists, Peter Tatchell said shortly after arriving in Moscow for the city’s second Gay Pride.
 
May 25:  Russia:  She Promises, She Delivers – Vladimir Luxuria in Moscow for Gay Pride.  An interview with Europe's first trangendered politician.